Little White Lies….

 

OK, admit it.  You’ve done it yourself.  Your 5-year-old asked, “Mom, is there really a Santa Claus?”  The little soccer player that lives in your home wonders aloud, “Dad, do you think I’m the best player on my team?”  Your wife asks your opinion about a new outfit: “Honey, does this make me look…”.  No, I’m not even going to go there.

A "little white lie" could be defined as “a small, harmless untruth or half-truth, usually told to avoid hurting someone's feelings or to be polite.”  We understand when we tell these “little lies” that our intent was innocent; our purpose was to avoid an awkward situation; or we believe the “little lie” wouldn’t have any real consequences.  We all get it.

But didn’t your mother teach you that “Honesty is the best policy.”  Growing up you heard stories about little George Washington admitting that he did, in fact, chop down the cherry tree – “I cannot tell a lie…” – and you were urged to be just as honest as little George.  IS honesty really the best policy ALL the time, and how do we make that determination?

What does the Bible teach us?  How about a couple of examples from the many available:

The Lord detests lying lips, but he delights in those who tell the truth.  Proverbs 12:22

So stop telling lies. Let us tell our neighbors the truth, for we are all parts of the same body.  Ephesians 4:25

If we’re not supposed to lie and we do it anyway, what happens?  And who gets to decide if it’s OK in the moment?  Or is it NEVER OK?

Abraham from the Old Testament faced such a dilemma.  He and his wife, Sarah, set up their tents in the lands of a new king, Abimelech.  Here’s what happened:

Abraham introduced his wife, Sarah, by saying, “She is my sister.” So, King Abimelech of Gerar sent for Sarah and had her brought to him at his palace.  Genesis 20:2

Look out!  Now Abraham has really stepped in it.  The king wants his wife for himself because Abraham told a little white lie.  Seems like a BIG one, right?  But look at the full truth that came out when Abraham was questioned by Abimelech:

Whatever possessed you to do such a thing?”   Abraham replied, “I thought, ‘This is a godless place. They will want my wife and will kill me to get her.’   And she really is my sister, for we both have the same father, but different mothers.  And I married her.   When God called me to leave my father’s home and to travel from place to place, I told her, ‘Do me a favor. Wherever we go, tell the people that I am your brother.’”  Genesis 20:10-13

For now, can we just skip over the part where Abraham married his half-sister and get back to the “white lie” business?  Different time, different world.  Forget too, the apparent lack of chivalry in Abraham’s reasoning process.  He told a half-truth – a “white lie” – to avoid a bad situation.  

God didn’t condone it, but He still protected Abraham.  He didn't approve of Abraham's deception, but He did remain faithful to His covenant with him.  Abraham's failure did not cancel God's faithfulness. 

God understands our fears.  He acknowledges that, try as we might, we don’t always step up with integrity and truthfulness.  HE is full of integrity, truth, and righteousness, and we are called to be His image-bearers in this world.  We’ll make mistakes and err in judgment more often than we’d like, and way more than God would desire.  But He still loves and protects us.

How did the story with Abraham and Abimelech end?  The king restored Sarah to Abraham having never touched her, gave Abraham generous gifts showing his sorrow for taking her, and publicly acknowledged Abraham's innocence.  In turn, 

“…Abraham prayed to God, and God healed Abimelech, his wife, and his female servants, so they could have children.”   Genesis 20:17

The next time you think about telling a little white lie, remember that you are a representative of the God of Creation as the words pass your lips.  The apostle Paul reminds us in Ephesians 4:15 to “speak the truth in love.”  What does that mean?  It means that truth is meant to help people, not to hurt them.  It means you must care as much about the person as you do about the facts you share.  

So, when you speak the truth in love, seeing others with the heart of your Heavenly Father, then it’s OK to say, “Yes, Virginia, there is a Santa Claus.”

Jacob